Glimpse

It has happened a few times, mostly with the boys. I will get a glimpse of what they will be like as grown-ups. It happens in a flash but it always manages to take my breath away. It is more than the way they will look but it is a flash of who they will be when they are older.

I cant really explain how it happens, or why. But I've noticed that it does indeed happen more frequently with my boys than with Madeline. It happened yesterday at the pool with Jack.

We were wading in the water and he looked at me with a very knowing look on his face, and he paused and met my eye for more than a moment. I could see him as a grown-up, perhaps my age. The wisdom, confidence and intelligence that I saw in that glimpse was so assuring. It is very difficult to explain.

The same thing has happened several times with Noah as well. He will just pause and look at me for more than a moment and there is some sort of exchange. I can see him strong, sure and proud, but as an adult.

This glimpse has yet to happen with Madeline. I know that they boys are old souls. They both are wise and know things that they shouldn't know at this age. I've known this about both of them since they were in utero. I know that Maddie is a newer soul. She doesn't come with this deep wisdom and understanding, she does come with an incredible sense of wonder, amazement, curiosity and a fresh set of eyes to the experience around her.

Perhaps I cannot get the glimpses of her because she is already a reflection of me, maybe more of a reflection of me than the boys are. If this is the case then I need to take a lesson from her and stay with her in her moment of curiosity. That is if I dont get distracted by the wise glances from the boys.